Lord Help Us. by Dori Killion
My mother was not devoutly religious but she had one favorite prayer she recited often and out loud: “Lord Help Us”.
I was the child that was unhappy, (One out of five … not bad odds I would say.) I wouldn’t go with the flow; couldn’t overlook the chaos and clutter that tired parents of five allow into their lives. Couldn’t understand why the walls were not a blank mural just waiting for my gift in the way of original art.
As a child “victim” of poor household management, I kind of gave up asking for help at some point and just took matters into my own hands. I would become the help if that’s what it took to be at peace.
In relationships where there is no healthy debate the Spirit says, ‘take up the pen, shed those feelings of unworthiness and stop believing you are what other people think of you. What do you think of yourself?’ Help is a place to befriend myself.
Cancer reminded me that I am completely and utterly alone in my body. Help became a place where I found the chutzpah to walk the world with a profound faith that I matter, my life matters, and my dreams matter.
My ongoing petition is for strength and courage to change the things I can change. Help me God to be a gentle person, help me cherish every moment. Help. I want to be a truth seeker. Help me prepare to face fear and hate and injustice.